Category: Leadership

A Top Coaching Goal Among Business Leaders


Which of the following coaching goals would you reckon leaders find most valuable working on? Becoming more strategic and impactful, inspiring their team, influencing diverse stakeholders, building executive presence, being empathetic, assertive or less stressed. While each of these comes up frequently, the one that leaders find particularly rewarding is becoming more emotionally secure.

Despite the success, many people in leadership roles feel insecure within. They experience the imposter syndrome – the feeling that they are not good enough for their role. Some are insecure about their educational or professional background, others about their lack of gravitas.

Many are anxious about how they measure up against their peers and the narrowing opportunities at the top of the pyramid. Some have a nagging concern about the risk of losing their reputation, others about staying relevant after retiring from a high-powered role.

Why does the insecurity prevail

Invariably, our insecurities are a symptom of a deeper unfulfilled emotional need to be accepted, respected or loved. This may be a part of our karmic imprint or a result of our childhood experiences. However, we grow up confusing security with success. Success can surely enhance our financial security. But while, success, status or power can dull the intensity of insecurity, they can’t heal the sense of incompleteness within us. I can relate to this as I have been there.

Irrespective of professional success, we can remain locked in our conditioned patterns of thinking. We chase societal expectations but lack an inner anchor of deeply knowing what matters most to us. Without such clarity, the only way to assess our progress is by external validation or by comparing ourselves to others. Neither of which can fundamentally make us feel whole.

Why they find this goal important

Leaders find addressing this area crucial to their professional effectiveness and personal happiness.

Feeling insecure about achieving their results makes them more directive and micro-manage their team. As a result, the team feels less empowered. They seek perfection in themselves and others and lose sense of strategic…

To continue reading, please click here »
Posted by Rajiv Vij | Leadership, Personal mastery, Relationships | 7 Comments

Join, Lead, Start or Build Such Organisations

Social enterprises

Patagonia is a social enterprise. It’s in the business of saving the planet. With $1 billion in sales, they produce premium outdoor clothing in a highly sustainable way. Their products use nearly 90% recycled materials. To counter the waste generated by fast fashion, they produce long-lasting products and even offer a repair and reuse program. Their entire US business uses 100% renewable energy.

They are heavily into climate activism and give away 1% of their sales for preservation of natural environment. Their founder has decided to direct all future profits to protecting the global environment.

Organisations the world needs

Would you agree that the capitalistic business model that singularly aims to maximise shareholders’ returns is flawed and has run its course? That, single-minded pursuit of profits ignores social and environmental costs; relentless and high velocity action creates a stressful work environment; and lack of clarity of organisational purpose leaves employees unfulfilled.

On the other hand, the social-sector does hugely meaningful work but is constrained in many ways. Their dependence on external funding, inability to attract talent and often lack of efficient systems hampers their effectiveness and scalability.

What we need is a business model that focuses on solving social problems in a financially sustainable way. One that serves as a link between the efficiency and scale of market-based systems and the social impact of philanthropy. Where the financial goals are important, but do not in any way undermine societal goals. We need more social enterprises!

Social enterprises and the power of purpose

Social enterprises are deeply mission-driven organisations. Where the purpose of their existence is not an add-on objective, but is at the very heart of their everyday work. Where ‘doing well’ follows the pursuit of ‘doing good’.

Their sense of purpose is also more motivating and fulfilling for the employees. This matters even more to Millennials who make up nearly 50% of today’s workforce. They find their job more fulfilling when they have opportunities to make a positive impact on social and environmental issues. Many of them are…

To continue reading, please click here »
Posted by Rajiv Vij | Global challenges, Leadership, Self-growth | Comments Off on Join, Lead, Start or Build Such Organisations

REAP: The Success Mantra For 2021 and Beyond


People are like stained-glass windows. They sparkle and shine when the sun is out. But when the darkness sets in, their true beauty is revealed only if there is a light from within. ~ Elisabeth Kübler-Ross, Author

What differentiates highly successful people from merely good ones is their ability to shine during times of crisis. I have had the privilege of working with some such individuals. I notice that their key to thriving in uncertain and volatile times is their mastery over their inner self.

It’s not what happens to us during a crisis, but how we respond to it that determines our outcomes. The work we do with strengthening our emotional and mental make-up, sharpening our focus, and acting with purpose improves the quality of our responses. Which in turn positively affects our outcomes and experiences.

The inner work we need to do has to be at all four levels of our being. Mental, emotional, physical and spiritual. REAP is an expression of that wholistic work. This work has the power to positively affect all aspects of our life. It can help us be not only more successful at work, but also kinder and loving in our personal relationships, and healthier, happier and more fulfilled.

Resilience

At the mental level, it’s about building the right mindset. It’s about overcoming our fears and doubts and building confidence, positivity and resilience. Think Rafael Nadal and Virat Kohli. Irrespective of the score on the board, they would always like to believe that they can win. But how do you build the right mindset?

Our mindset is a function of our deep-seated beliefs. These beliefs dictate how we think, feel and act. For example, in the current crisis, if you strongly believe that your life will never be the same again, you are bound to feel anxious and demotivated. If you could only embrace some alternate beliefs, you will feel and act differently.

The belief that other than an exceptionally tragic event, generally no single event, positive or negative,…

To continue reading, please click here »
Posted by Rajiv Vij | Leadership, Personal mastery, Self-growth | 4 Comments

Beware Of The Trap Of Successism

Successism

I was fortunate to grow rapidly in my career. At 33, I became the India CEO of a global firm and at 36, the MD for the Asia region. I was happy and proud of my success. However, as I look back, I had been steadily falling into the trap of what I now call, Successism.

Like many of the other isms in our society, such as racism, casteism, sexism and ageism, successism is an ill-perceived lens to view people as unequal. Successism excessively revers competition, achievement and visible success. We consider success as the defining feature of one’s identity and subconsciously perceive successful people as superior and less successful people somewhat lesser.

Clearly a dysfunctional way to relate to others and to ourselves. While striving for excellence in any field is a worthy pursuit, it’s a real problem if the level of visible success becomes the primary yardstick to measure a person. The prevalent ‘winner takes all’ mentality only makes it worse. As a result, the more successful become more egoistic and arrogant and the less so frustrated and depressed.

The source of successism

Deep down, successism is a reflection of our individual lack of self-worth. When we see ourselves as inadequate and incomplete, we seek to fill that inner void by looking outside. We gravitate towards believing that only if certain external events materialise in our life, we will somehow be more complete. Goaded by the disproportionate value modern society places on visible success, this can become a relentless pursuit over all else.

We then judge ourselves on the basis of our progress on this path. Equally, we judge others on the same measure. All along, failing to recognise that it’s a faulty lens through which we are seeing the world. We completely miss the point that unless we do the self-work to strengthen our self-worth, no amount of external success can fill that inner void. Even if in the short term it seems otherwise.

Unless we focus on cultivating

To continue reading, please click here »
Posted by Rajiv Vij | Community, Leadership, Self-growth | 20 Comments

Reflect More, And Know This Crucial Factor To Make It Count


As much as we need exercise for our physical health, we need a regular reflective practice for our mental and emotional well-being. A few minutes of quiet time, away from all the emails and social media noise, when we can simply connect with our inner being.

We ordinarily have over fifty thousand thoughts in a day. Moments of solitude allow us to slow down this neurotic pace of mental activity. As we learn to observe our recurring thought patterns, we also begin to see the futility of many of our thoughts that usually preoccupy us.

Besides, building our reflective capacity strengthens our emotional equilibrium. We are then less easily affected by the daily ups and downs of life. We also become more thoughtful and less reactive in our responses.

I have personally found meditation to be a great support in this regard. Some people find writing a journal therapeutic; some practicing yoga and pranayama; and some listening to inspirational talks. Some others have a practice of positive affirmations where they recall three to five positive and reassuring statements a few times of day. This helps them proactively stay in an even-keel emotional and mental state.

One shift to make your reflective practice count

I consider myself a thoughtful and reflective person. I tend to be intense in whatever I do and can easily drift towards perfectionism. Committed to self-improvement and personal growth, I bring the same approach there too. Some years ago, I noticed a tendency in my reflections to sometimes seek answers to a certain type of questions. Particularly, when I clearly fell short of my own expectations. For example, if I lost my cool in a family conversation or found myself judging someone or wanting in my level of generosity. I wondered, why can’t I stay more present, why can’t I be less judgmental and be more loving, why is it so hard even though I am so committed to be a certain…

To continue reading, please click here »
Posted by Rajiv Vij | Leadership, Personal mastery, Relationships, Self-growth, Uncategorized | 9 Comments

The Unexpected Positive Shifts Triggered By Covid Crisis


In my last post (Covid-19 is just the preview, beware of the real show), I talked about some of the disturbing themes, like income inequality and climate change, that might get exacerbated by Covid-19. While the health, economic and social challenges are still unfolding, there are some unexpected positive shifts arising from this tragedy.

Lockdown forces reflection

Crisis is an inflection point that simply draws us to reflect. Lockdown driven solitude is forcing everyone to look within. I am sure you’ve had some reflective moments of your own in recent weeks. You start to wonder what matters most in life – well-being, family, kindness, equanimity, resilience? Besides, witnessing the sacrifices made by health workers and the plight of millions of migrant workers in India has touched each one of us deeply.

It’s making us feel more grateful for the life we have and be empathetic towards the well-being of others. When we are grateful and empathetic, we are at our kindest. Many of the hundreds of individuals I have surveyed at the end of my webinars would like to commit to becoming a kinder, calmer and wiser person. It’s visible. While the current needs of NGOs are enormous, the kind of outpouring of support that’s coming though is heartening.

Hopefully, we continue to harness these precious emotions and not let them get buried when better times come around. What we need most in modern society is not rapid economic development, but greater empathy, sharing, kindness and compassion.

Future of work starts shifting to home

Lockdowns have created a significant unintended positive consequence. It’s the possibility of a large number of employees working from home in the future. WFH is now a real thing and WFA (A for anywhere) will follow.

74% of the companies surveyed by Gartner intend shifting at least some part of their workforce to work remotely permanently. Deloitte believes 50 million jobs in south east Asia could move to WFH. TCS announced that 75% of their employees will work from home within…

To continue reading, please click here »
Posted by Rajiv Vij | Global challenges, Leadership | 2 Comments

Can’t Go Outside? Try Going Inside

Calm

My 87-years old dad went through the second world war, the India-Pakistan partition and even went to jail for Mahatma Gandhi’s Jail Bharo Andolan. Chatting with him on the current pandemic was insightful. Here are four key thoughts that arose from that discussion.

Calm amidst the panic

Fear levels around us are high and palpable. The reality is that our prehistoric brain is wired for survival – not peace and equanimity. We instinctively feel fearful with even the slightest of triggers affecting our survival. (Think stepping on a rope in the dark!) The current crisis is unprecedented and potentially devastating at multiple levels. It may turn out to be a generation-defining event. Fear is naturally turning to panic.

While fear and panic are totally understandable, we need to recognise the need to stay calm. Being calm and positive (while staying vigilant and following all the necessary guidelines) is the key to effectively working our way through any crisis. Listening to the horror stories of the partition from my dad, it is clear that if the health crisis continues, each of us will likely experience a roller coaster of emotions – from denial, anxiety, anger and panic to sadness and despair.

To build greater equanimity, it helps to switch off from the external world of news and social media and instead focus on our inner world. Simply sitting still and becoming an observer of our varying emotions helps. It is important that while observing our emotions, we remain focused only on observing, without judging them (or ourselves). With consistent practice, the volatility of our emotions does subside. (Read: Try mindfulness meditation and ABC of anxiety)

We along with I

With the virus spreading rapidly, protecting ourselves and our loved ones is important. However, if we are healthy, it is essential that we also pay attention to helping others in any way we can. Whether it is the frontline health workers, the daily wage earners or the families of our domestic helpers. Being helpful is…

To continue reading, please click here »
Posted by Rajiv Vij | Community, Global challenges, Leadership, Self-growth | 17 Comments

Will The Rich Change For The Sake Of The Climate?


“Everybody talks about the weather, but nobody ever does anything about it.” ~ Mark Twain.

I too have been guilty of this. I thought I was doing my bit by segregating waste, using more recycled products, buying more organic food, avoiding plastic, using energy saving devices and so forth. Clearly, I was lulled into a sense of complacency. However, triggered by the onslaught of adverse news, from Delhi pollution and the Venice flooding to forest fires in California and Australia, I decided to calculate my own annual carbon footprint.

It is roughly 11 tons. Just to put it in perspective, an average American’s annual carbon footprint is 16T, an average Indian is 1.8T and the global average is around 4.5T. If the world follows through on the Paris climate change accord, the global average would need to be below 2T by 2050. I guess that’s what my goal should be – progressively reducing my carbon footprint from 11T to 2T.

Looking through the data, what was apparent was that the biggest contributors of CO2 emissions for me are: a) use of my car, b) consumption of food and other household products, c) international travel, and d) use of electricity. Incidentally, I work from home and use my car only 3-4 times a week, I am not an extravagant spender and my international travel is limited to a couple of holidays and a few short work-related trips every year. If you are a business leader, I wonder what your carbon footprint might be?

As I analyse my options for the way forward, it is becoming quite evident that there aren’t many easy answers and that we would need more substantive shifts. I thought of sharing with you some of the views I have explored in case they are helpful in some way.

Calculate your carbon footprint

What gets measured gets done. If we don’t have a clear measure of our carbon footprint and its sources, we may remain ignorant of the personal efforts we need to make…

To continue reading, please click here »
Posted by Rajiv Vij | Global challenges, Leadership, Self-growth | 6 Comments

The Bane Of Modern Society: Excessive Individualism


Individualism has been on the ascent across the world over the past few decades. Individualism per se is not necessarily bad. Individualism treats each individual as an independent entity and favours individual freedom over collective or state control. It encourages individuals to have a greater sense of self-responsibility and offers rewards more directly linked to their contributions. This empowering approach may well be responsible for some of the extraordinary achievements of individuals in the fields of business, science, technology and even sports.

However, I believe we have reached a stage where the balance between what’s good for the individual and what’s good for society may have tilted too much towards the individual. Fuelled by instant and disproportionate rewards for individual success in a capitalistic world, ‘I’, ‘Me’ and ‘Mine’ have taken centre-stage in our lives. The mantra of ‘winner takes all’ makes us self-centred. We instinctively perceive the world from a competitive lens rather than a collaborative one.

Books and media are a telling reflection of this cultural change. Scanning Google’s digitised database of over five million books, research has revealed that between 1960 and 2008, individualistic expressions like self, unique, all about me, I am special, and I’m the best have grown significantly. During that time, use of words like kindness, helpfulness, gratitude and modesty declined by over 70%. 

Effects of excessive individualism

Individualism becomes excessive when instead of acknowledging that Everyone is special, we emphasise on I am special. The ugly side of this shift is now on display in all aspects of our society. Excessive individualism divides society into winner and losers. As a result, depression is on the rise, particularly among the young. It only gets worse by spending time on social media where narcissism is on the up and respect for others on the down. Personal relationships are quick to fracture and marriages break routinely. With the intent to enhance…

To continue reading, please click here »
Posted by Rajiv Vij | Global challenges, Leadership, Self-growth | 16 Comments

Alter Your Relationship With Disagreements


Joseph runs the Asia marketing division for a multinational corporation. He hated disagreements. Harmony was his overwhelming preference. He tended to avoid any confrontation with his colleagues as well as his family members. He felt uncomfortable even when people he cared about were arguing with each other. His colleagues described him as diplomatic as he always found ways to not take sides in any argument.

While he felt comfortable with this approach, this was clearly impacting his effectiveness. He found it hard to call out under-performers in his team. He also struggled to influence his seniors and peers as he failed to engage in difficult conversations with them. Likewise, it affected his relationships at home.

During our work together, as he chose to examine his tendencies, he became more aware of his personality traits and core beliefs underlying this behaviour. He recognised that he’s a sensitive person and avoids confrontation to minimise the risk of being hurt. He also viewed disagreements as a win-lose contest, where only one person could win and the other had to lose.

Most importantly, he became very aware of his intrinsic need to be liked. He was subconsciously operating from the belief that if he had a disagreement with someone, they would feel offended. Or worse, they may dislike him. He simply assumed that everyone was as sensitive as him and that they would take any argument as a personal attack.

With continued reflections, he realised that he clearly had an unhealthy relationship with ‘disagreements’. Here are three ideas he has been successfully working on to reform this relationship.

1. View disagreements as integral to a healthy relationship

He has begun to appreciate that while harmony is important for a lasting relationship, it doesn’t need to be that way a hundred percent of the time. Whenever two people engage in a…

To continue reading, please click here »
Posted by Rajiv Vij | Leadership, Relationships, Self-growth | 3 Comments